I’m gonna try to feel bad right now, oh wait there’s the phone.

Okay now where was I?  Where am I right now?

I’m gonna try to be sad right now. Just let me clean my desk first.

I just realized they didn’t put bacon on that cheeseburger I ate, but it was still good.

What was I just about to do?

Oh, yeah I’m supposed to be crying over you.

I’m not trying to be mean. I’ve got it written down right here. You can look if you

want.  I’m sorry there’s no tear in my beer just yet.

But I’m gonna try to feel bad right now. Just for you. I wish I had a cup of coffee.

That sounds nice, though I don’t usually drink it in middle of a warm sunny day.

What was I about to do now? Oh, yeah. No, I didn’t forget. I just got a little side

tracked. Here I go. I’m gonna try to feel bad right now.

On the count of three.

Just let me use the bathroom first.

I’m sorry that you feel bad.  I’m sorry if you feel sad.

I’m not really sure you do though.

All I’m sure about is you want me to feel bad because I made you feel sad.

But maybe you’re fine.  And you just want me to suffer some more.

Like you can make me feel bad from afar.

You know, on second thought,

I don’t have time to try to feel bad.

Or care that you might feel sad.

Or have you pause for a moment in my mind.

I’m not that good an actor.

Your feelings are not a factor.

In anything I do.

In anywhere I go.

Forever and ever amen.